can't even go there yet.....really?

Little Drummer Boy from gfc.tv Videos on Vimeo.

give this video a moment to upload...i don't want you to miss a single moment.

i have listened to this over & over this morning.

this rendition is hands down my favorite Christmas song ever

&

i'm so excited to  tell you it is my church on Christmas eve last year.

(& we'll be there again this year!)

one of the most holy, beautiful, powerful, humbling events i've ever been a part of.

our church wanted to be available for the community to come & hear the good news of Jesus

& boy did we ever

all  eight or nine thousand of us.

eight or nine thousand worshiping together on Christmas eve!!
amazing!

~

last night dan & i stopped in one of my favorite little shops.

the owner had unpacked dozens of boxes full of Christmas goodies.

the ( grumpy) woman beside me mumbled

"i can't even go there yet"

her words have rung in my heart this morning

at first i judged her & thought....really? YOU can't go there yet?

a savior was born

for all of us
& you can't be bothered yet.

as if.....

i know what she meant.

i do.
i know she probably referring to all the commercialism.
i know that's probably what she meant.

i know this is an emotional time for so many
i know this is a reminder of loneliness for some
of unbearable hearbreak for others.

for that very reason
i want to focus my spirit on going there.
remembering that there is hope
no matter what the situation.

so~

this morning i began to wonder

while i would never say that....

i love this time of year...i'm pulling out my chirstmas cd's. today.

does my heart say that?

does my heart act as if i'm not ready & i can't go there yet?

monday was november 1st

to me, it signified the beginning of 'the season'

i spend an embarrassing amount of time on my laptop

so i decided i would unplug for the day.

i got on fb for about 5 minutes

quickly uploaded a blog post

&then put this little bad boy aside

& went about my day

i was able to accomplish much.

who knew?

i decided to hop in my car & drive to the park

alone

with my camera

& just be

it was only an hour

but i felt my soul was nourished

& my spirit was calm

i heard the ripple of the water

& felt the breeze on my face

i could smell the fresh fragrance of fall

as i left the park there is a short part of the road that merges with the highway.

as i approached i could see a little man

he looked like he was 150 years old. seriously.

hobbling with a cane

wearing a veterans hat

& holding a sign that simply said

"i'm hungry"

it was all so fast

i was merging with other cars

the light was green

i couldn't stop in the middle of the road

i live in the suburbs

this is not a usual occurrence

i drove through the light

and then another light

before i realized i was all teary

ironically i was on the way to my grocery store

to buy groceries for my family

i quickly turned around & pulled through the closest restaurant

( remember i had my camera with me, ok)

& ordered him some food

my heart was about to beat out of my chest

 i was sorta excited about helping this little man

as i approached the intersection

i put on my hazard lights

he was gone

i  couldn't have taken more than 5 minutes

and this little fragile old man

was gone

i drove & drove

slowly

with my hazards on

trying to find him

for 30 minutes i went up and down the streets

caroline was soon to get off the bus...i needed to get back home.

i was completely deflated

while i was trying to find my little old veteran

i happened to pass this guy

in broad day light he was wearing a reflector vest

pushing a bike

with dozens of empty baggies tied to it

i pulled up beside him

& asked him he would allow me to give him a meal

i could tell he wasn't "all there"

he kept telling me had no where to put it

i'm thinking....well, how 'bout your tummy?

or

better yet

in one of the dozens of empty bags tied to your bike?

he said thank you but no thank you

i have grown up in this community

& lived within 5 miles of this area most of my life.

i have never

not once

seen a homeless person

a strange possibly unstable person pushing a bike down the highway

ever

in this area

never before.

i drove home

with my now cold combo

& melted frosty

having never found the original homeless looking man

& turned down by another

i don't tell you this to make me look like a hero.

for crying out loud. it was only 6 bucks and 30 minutes.

i tell you this because

while i want to decorate my home to celebrate this glorious time of the year

& have the gifts all wrapped magazine worthy

yummy menus planned

& tummy's filled

i more importantly want my heart to 'go there'

for my spirit to be sensitive to those around me who are in need

i have a savior who came to bind the broken hearted.

i want to go there

whether its july 1

november 1

or december 1

Hebrews 13:2

Be not forgetful to entertain strangers

for thereby some have entertained angels unaware